Open Sesame

"Let me get this straight, you and your bf both goes out to have fun?"
"Yup."
"So, it's alright for you to have sex with me?"
"Yup."
"Why not threesome? You, me and your bf?"
"No way."
"Why not?"
"How could I stand to see someone besides me having fun with my bf?"
"But you just said that you and him both goes out to have fun..."
"Yeah, but it's two different thing."
"It is? So, basically what you're telling me is that you share your bf with strangers but not someone that you might know?"
"You can say so."
"Hmm...."

There are a few types of open relationship. One of those are which both go separate way to have fun but never together. This kind of relationship befuddles me. They are protective over their bf yet they allow them to go outside to have fun. Maybe one of them has the habit of outsourcing body parts for sexual intercourse purpose, so the other might have been coax into the act... although it seems highly unlikely. The whole situation just seems like a paradox to me which I can't begin to understand.

If you were to say that both went out for their fun and also came together for group fun, that I can understand. It's actually match made in heaven. It's just like two faithful guy together, two slutty guy together are also consider a great match. At least the matter of infidelity are no longer troubling the relationship. Look at the famous celebrity couple in the circle. Obviously, rumors has it that they often organize group fun together which includes heavy usage of drugs. I don't know them personally, but it all sounds fine to me. As long as they are happy doing what they want to do, there really isn't much we should comment on. Maybe an invitation to one of those party, that would be something. Another thing to add to my profoundly-vain-to-do-list.

Initiative

When walked into a cubicle of a toilet, why do people not close the door? Sometimes it can be awkward when you push open a cubicle door just to find someone in there pissing. There will be a moment of pause where you ponder whether you should close the door or leave it ajar. Whether you should pretend nothing happen or whisper a quick apology instead. Is it because we are just going for a quicky and closing the door seems too much a hassle? Is the 1 second of close-lock that troublesome? The door are meant to be closed,  close it.

When you are on second floor and wanted to go to the third floor, should you take the stair, the escalator or the lift? It's amazing that sometimes people are willing to wait for the lift just to move up one floor when the stair and escalator are within reachable distance in a relatively safe condition. Are we getting lazier as technology pamper us more and more?

When you initiate chat with someone or added them to your msn, and realized that their look are not to your liking, do you quickly ignores them and block them? Feint interest? Or inform them that they are not to your liking and will ignore them henceforth? The first is definately rude but when you're used to it you learn to live with it. I would much prefer to have the third option but rarely get those, I guess we were never that straight  forward, maybe because we were not straight in the first place. Feinting interest, well quite a few people practice so, they usually tone it down level by level until both forgotten each other... But the problem with this option is that people might genuienly thinks that you are interested which then one would have to delicately manuever out of the mess that we get ourselves into, without grudges. But sometimes, poeple can be likened once you get to know them beyond the superficial outlook and that goes for sex too I should add. Some people do well in bed eventhough they don't look beyond par while some really just has a look without essence or skill. Although there are also those people that you get to despise the longer you know them...

Everything is just a matter of initiative. If you chat up with the guy you meet in gym or pub or chatroom, you might find that he is a nice guy, or not. If you go out to buy 1+3D, you might be a hell lot richer tomorrow or RM10 poorer.

Beauty Under

Woman are mostly conscious about the lingarie they wear, see how big Victoria's Secret become. Woman like it, straight men like it even more. Gay men likes them too, but purely from the aesthetic point of view. Why don't men has such a line in the fashion industry, something big like Victoria's Secrets... It would be nice to see a show where hunky male model walks out in skimpy sexy under garment...

Commercial mens underwear can be so boring sometimes. Even those in porn looks boring. Although a toned handsome man in a pair of simple white brief looks the most sexy... but still, I wish there were more varieties to look at and choose from. To see everyone wearing the same pair of CK boxer brief is starting to get on my-nerves. Somehow, gay men seems to be in two extreme group of CK brief or pasar malam brief.

Underwears usually comes in a pack of 3, except for boxers. Sometimes it is hard to decide on the brand and style. Should I go for those with the name printed on the band so that it shows when I'm wearing a low back jean? Or should I go for mini that squeeze my butt and crotch onto a bubbly shape? Do I go for g-strings to eliminate the unsightly line when I don my skin tight leather pants? Should I really wear jockstrap when I'm going to gym for the sake of being truly sporty? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Not that I have a collector's fetish towards underwear, but it is nice to have assorted type of underwear to cater for different occasion. A pair of sexy undie really does spice up the sex life. But having 3 pairs of g-string is simply too much to ask for. I really only need one which I probably would only wear once in a very long time. So at times, I find my-self having the evil thought of switching a pair of g-string with that box of 3 piece boring brief that I am buying. But conscience get the best out of me. Imagine buying a pack of g-string just to find that a pair has been switched by some perverted guy. But then again, it's your own fault for not checking...

I wonder if there is a shop that allows you to pick your own undie, that way, I really only to buy once for my year long sexual fantasy role playing... Or maybe I should underwear-pool. You know, three guys buying three pack of different under wear and exchange it among themselves... It sounds oh so weird...

Love VS Sex

"So, how's things between you and that slutty bf of yours?"
"Cold war I guess."
"For goodness sake, dump him already. You deserve better than a jerk like him."
"But I'm tired already."
"Wouldn't you be even more tired with him doing those things he did behind your back?"
"Do you know that we are both top? We are not sexually compatible."
"Bullshit. Just excuses for him to fool around. You don't go fooling around yourself.... Did you?"
"Fuck off."

Love and sex are both important. Sex without love is ONS. Love without sex is tragedy. We would want to have both, but in essence, not many can be as lucky. It's easy to get sex, it's just a matter of quality sex or not. If you are desperate enough, a mouth and a hole is all that you need and everybody has those. But love, well, it's not as easy. We need to find someone that we are comfortable with, someone that we can communicate with, someone that we like. So the question is, is sex an integral part of love?

If it is, then that means our pre-requisite for love is the sexual role one play. It would probably be easier for a versatile but what if you are not? Then should the first question that you ask your prospect candidate "Top, Bottom or Versatile?". Isn't that just the thing that most love searcher despise? But what if you were to get to  know someone and end up falling madly in love with him, just to find out that you are both sexually incompatible? Sure, when you have had enough sex, you'll know that sex is over exaggerated but still it is essential in maintaining a healthy relationship. Role conversion, well, that's just pulling the string too thin. People says that they are willing to convert for the sake of their love one but sometimes reality kicks in painfully, literally. Of course, nobody is born a bottom, it's a matter of willingness to try. But still, it remains an uncertainty. If all else fails and both of you are really unable to satisfy each other sexually, should you just break up or change it to a open relationship instead?

Some relationship starts with sex. So, sex is not a problem. Yet, people in such relationship are weary. Weary about the fact that their partners are willing to try sex without love. There is no guarantee of how faithful one is. Sure, it's all a matter of trust. But still, we wouldn't be able to shrug off that tiny voice of insecurity.

It's not easy to find a person that we are comfortable with and when one has been through the rollercoaster of love long enough, we learn to know what kind of man we want. Once we hone in, we would wish that it stay still and hope that it last. People say that gay love can't last because they have seen too many tragedies to know better. But even if for straight, their love don't last either, that is where divorce comes in. Maybe what we need is legalizing gay marriage but we all know how unlikely that is here in this part of the world.

Standard of Measurement

How do you answer the question, are you a good fucker or good bottom? Should we be humble or should we be proud? Yes or no doesn't seems quite the answer. Still, how do you judge your own performance? Do people send out questionaires nowadays to evaluate their sexual performance? Or do we look at the repeat order and the frequency of the repeat orders? Even if you perform well this time, does it mean you'll be able to perform as good next time? A certain trick might work on some, but it can disgust someone else too. How can be say how skillful we are in this matter?

If someone were to say that they are good in bed, we obviously have very high expectation of what we are getting. And more often then not, it would turn out to be a disaster because nobody who says that they are good can ever be as good as we want them to be. It's best to leave it to the unknown. But then again, it would be good to know how good a person is too, if you know that it's gonna be a toothpick, you'll probably wanna stay home to pick your own teeth instead. Plus, if you say that you are a good bottom, does it not imply that your hole is loose for you have encountered one too many prick to make you the master you are today? Loose means good? Tight means good? If you are tight, you probably haven't done it as often to  make you good I presume. Or maybe it was the fable hole tightening secret technique...

How do you answer the question, are you good looking? Obviously if a lot of people says that you are, you probably are. But what about the rest of the world who just look normal. I look normal sounds so uninviting. Or should we just shove them our picture and let them decide for us? How many rejection can we accept until we start to think that we are ugly instead?

But bear in mind that most people post a picture that they deem nice, so there might be a certain degree of differences between the photo and the real deal. It's call being photogenic. Some people look better in photo while others better in real. Somehow, people have this expectation of what you see is what you get. If you get something better out of the deal, we call ourselves lucky. If it's something less then expected, you call the  others liar. And it is always the other person's fault for we remain same and true all the way. For goodness sake, people gain or lose weight, they change their hair style and color and last but not least, people age. With so many factors involved, is it not possible that people look different from one picture to another? Plus people didn't say that they are good looking, what the hell did you go imagining stuff and all for?