It's funny how people is sometimes. We hope for things that would never come by. I thought that I am already pass that childish notion, of wanting what I know I would never get. But I guess I am human still, as much as I steel myself against the world, I can't help but feel vulnerable deep within, especially during those special days in life.
I have stop hoping for things in life, for I thought I have come to terms with the fact that I will never ever get what I hope for most. Thus I relinquish myself of all effort to hope. But that makes life bitters, without hope how would one live? But now I wonder, is that-which-is-not-attainable something that I still hope for? Did I manage to let go of wanting it, and move on to wanting other things in life? I thought I was firm then. I ask myself, how can one regain themselves when they have lost the very essence of life, the will to live? But it seems that human is forgetful, or maybe it was simply instinct to make painful memories fade, for as long as I still have the strength to breathe and the thought of snugging into eternal slumber does not surface, I can always find replacement for purpose to fuel the journey ahead.